GUEST BLOG – BONGREATNESS!

Greetings Reds fans and blog enthusiasts!  It is I, @Bongreatness, writing to you in the future…from the past.  You see, I’m writing this entry about two weeks before you’re going to read it due to an upcoming vacation of my own.  But since @Jamieblog asked me nicely to compose a guest blog post, I agreed to put something together before my own siesta.  And by “asked me nicely” I mean “Asked.  Then begged.  Then pleaded on bended knee.  Then threw a fit and openly cried while pounded his clenched fists on the floor of The Holy Grail.”  So I said, “what the heck” and “people are pointing and laughing, get off the freaking ground already” and I agreed to participate.  

 The only problem (for Jamie) with me writing a guest blog this time around, is that after long and careful consideration, I’ve decided that I can no longer sit by and idly watch as he blatantly steals all of my ideas for “Better Off Red”.  The name of his blog itself is a rip off of my short lived blog that I started in 2000 during my Creative Writing class at Ball State University – “Better Hoff Led”.  At the time Baywatch (or technically, at the time it was “Baywatch Hawaii”) was for the first time featuring a lead character other than David “The Hoff” Hasselhoff and my blog was a critique of the current show’s format versus the format circa 1989-2000.  At the time I had the #1 rated blog amongst Baywatch junkies.  For fun we would have “Better Hoff Led” Watch Parties at the TGIFriday’s in Muncie, Indiana.  Did my critique of the show’s new format and its lead actors work?  I don’t know, but in May 2001 NBC cancelled the series.  And if I can borrow one of Jamie’s favorite phrases…’just sayin’. 

 

Me and my good friend, The Hoff

 

Anyway, that would just seem to be the start of what has been a perpetual situation with @Jamieblog.  Whenever I come up with a new, original idea that I would suggest for his blog, he makes some slight, miniscule adjustment and starts calling it his own.  Is it frustrating?  Sure.  But at the end of the day just like “Gentle J” and @DatDudeBP are teammates on the field, so are @Jamieblog and I in the front office.  (Yes – I said “Gentle J”.  I first used that phrase while watching the game with Jamie in the Press Box when Paul debuted with a walk off base hit in 2008.  Next thing I know it’s “Soft J” this and “Soft J” that.)

 

What other instances are there where @Jamieblog has taken an idea of mine and made it his “own”?  I don’t know where to start.  Well, how about how he calls his Twitter followers “Fonzies”?  Excuse me, doesn’t that sound pretty similar to how I have always called my Twitter followers “Bonzies”??  I started my Twitter account in April 2009, while @Jamieblog didn’t exist until later that fall.  So he saw “Bonzies” and decided that rather than call his followers “Jamzies”, which makes no sense whatsoever, he would call them “Fonzies” after Arthur Fonzarelli.  Real original Jamie, real original.  Smh.  

 

What’s next – oh, I don’t know…I guess there’s stealing ideas, and then there is flat out grand larceny theat.  In late May 2008 we had a new General Manager, Walt Jocketty, and we brought up a new rightfielder who was tearing up the minor leagues, that being Jay Bruce of course.  That evening before Jay’s first game I decided to introduce the two of them to a new friend of mine – which I had recently adopted from the Bobblehead Homeless Shelter of the Midwest.  His picture is below with me, I’m sure you recognize him.  (Sigh)  Late in the summer of 2009 Burt and I were just chilling on my front porch in Norwood when Jamie pulled up in his gas-guzzler, 4-wheel drive SUV that has a personalized license plate – N4SIR – and a Motley Crue sticker that stretches across the entire rearview window.  Of course, I wasn’t scared at all at first – I mean Jamie’s a “cat person” for crying out loud.  But then I saw who he had brought with him – none other than @johnfayman.  I didn’t have the “Fayzer Tazer” anywhere in sight and upon Jamie’s command John kidnapped my dear friend Burt and told me if I told anyone that he would hurt Burt.  Only now do I feel that it’s safe for Burt that this information comes out.  I miss you Burt, good buddy…

 

The good ol' days with Burt

 

Need some icing on the cake?  Go no further than the “Magic Red Shoelaces”.  Ohhhhh, MRSLs.  It’s really tough for me to talk about this one because it cuts so deep.  But the truth has to be told at some time and this blog entry is the Warren Commission Report of Pro Blog entries.  About six years ago I wanted to pitch an idea around the Front Office, but before I could do so I had to confide in my good friend Jamie, to get his feedback.  At the time I was only entering my 2nd season with the Reds, and I just didn’t want to make a suggestion that wouldn’t be well received in the office.  So I asked Jamie, “In order to show our Reds pride and really get this city going about the team – what do you think about the idea of Magic Red Underwear?”  At the time he told me to get out of his office, it was 5:01PM and he wanted to go home.  Little did I know that there went my chance at becoming the #1 MLB Pro Blog.  Gone in an instant.

What might have been during the 2010 Postseason...

 

Well, what will happen now that these revelations have been made?  I’m not sure.  I just hope that it’s opened some eyes out there in the blogosphere, so that in the future the readers of “Better Off Red” will look deeper, for the truth.  It’s out there.  

 

@Jamieblog will return on July 11th, with some of his original ideas – the Minor League Report…wait, that was started by former Reds PR Assistant Mike Vassallo…I mean “Funkblast!”…oops, that was former Seattle GM & current Reds VP of Scouting & Player Development Bill Bavasi…I know, how about “Pick to Click”…nope, that came from Jamie’s mentor and Reds Marketing Manager Lisa Braun…the “Vote Reds Lunch”…that was Reds PR Manager Michael Anderson.  Well, I guess imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. 

 

Expect communications of better than anticipated happenings in the world,

 

 Zach

 

5 Comments

First Tressel, now Jamie…

Hmm. There is no TGI Friday’s in Muncie, Indiana. Is it possible this post is all lies?

ROFL!!! …….magic red underwear!!!……oh my!! ;)

Absolutely love this. Hysterical, Zach! Better Hoff Led, “Gentle J”, Magic Red Underwear…wow. hahahaha Too funny. 2 thumbs up…way up.

Pingback: GUEST BLOG – HAPPY THURSDAY FROM CJ BAUSANO! « Better Off Red

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 19,813 other followers

%d bloggers like this: