THE STORY OF MY FRIEND JERRY
Chapter 1: The other day, the cat (“Kiddie“) brought a small mouse into the house. After knocking it around a bit and giving it a small bite on its neck, Kiddie grew bored with the mouse and allowed it to go on it’s merry way.
Chapter 2: Knowing that no decent human being would ever allow a mouse to live in his house, I set out some sticky traps to capture this filthy, evil, awful little disgusting varmit.
Chapter 3: The traps worked. The filthy, evil, awful little disgusting varmit turned out to be a helpless, innocent little guy who was stuck in a formidable predicament.
Chapter 4: As my heart grew to the size of my giant head, I grabbed a bottle of vegetable oil and took the trap outside. It was hard to see the mouse in this situation. I poured the vegetable oil on the trap in hopes of freeing the cute little helpless dude’s legs so he could escape into his natural habitat. Well, it wasn’t that easy. I had to basically do everything to safely and humanely scrape his little tiny legs off the trap. The mouse was not having much fun and neither was I.
Chapter 5: The whole process took about 10 minutes. After his rescue, I named the mouse “Jerry.” Jerry was placed in a clear plastic container with holes poked in the top for ventilation. He was also given pieces of bread. But Jerry didn’t look well. Just as I was leaving for work, one last check-up on Jerry brought terrible news. It appeared that Jerry had passed away and went to little mouse heaven.
Chapter 6: I have to admit, I’m a softy. I was kind of sad and it certainly wasn’t the way I wanted to start my day, regardless of whether it was a mouse or not. Jerry was very young and a very small mouse. He couldn’t have been more than a week or two old and here he was getting taken away from his family by a big scary cat. Pretty traumatic, huh? Well, imagine going through all of that and then getting stuck in a trap for hours and then nearly having your legs pulled from your body in order to get out, all the while being doused with cold vegetable oil. Yeah, I’ll admit, I was a bit sad over the whole ordeal.
Chapter 7: I get a phone call from Jerry’s nurse saying that Jerry was actually moving and breathing! Moments later I get another call from the nurse saying that Jerry was actually moving around in his container!
Chapter 8: Last night, I purchased a cage, bedding and food for Jerry and named his new home “Small Jerry Fields” (runner up: “Jerry Park Stadium”). Jerry is currently recuperating in his new digs and very much alive.
Here’s a photo of Small Jerry Fields…
And if you’re scratching your head wondering what on earth thas has to do with the Reds, check this out!