Brandon Phillips is temporarily blinded during batting practice by Marty Brennaman’s new shirt.



In order to see just how serious Brandon Phillips’ injured wrist is, Reds bench coach Chris Speier challenges Brandon to hit him as hard as he can with a bat.



Party on, Miggy.



Without a Q-tip handy, Arthur Rhodes asks Brandon Phillips to help him remove some excess ear wax.



“C’mon baby! Let’s do the Twist!”



Chris Valaika shows off his moonwalk.



Juan Francisco and a bunch of dudes who just wondered in off the street shag flies in the GABP outfield.



In a strange sight earlier today, Chris Valaika has to duck a rabid condor to field this ground ball.



Rookie Yonder Alonso becomes the first player in Major League Baseball to use a first baseman’s mitt made out of an NFL football.



Brandon Phillips turns to stone after staring at Marty Brennaman’s shirt.



Miguel Cairo falls asleep during today’s stretch.


“Simon says look down at the ground….Look up…Simon didn’t say look up.”



Instead of hands, Brandon Phillips was born with 2 baseball gloves.



“I once survived FIFTY-FIVE days alone in the African grasslands with nothing but a spatula and a 2-liter of Faygo.”



“Then I had to bury myself in a cave filled with cobras, bats, spiders and mother-in-laws.  It was the scariest thing I’ve ever lived though.”



“So then I take him by the arm and say ‘Mr. President, I guarantee this will take care of our current economic problems and put an end to the Bird Flu.’ …And that’s how Pretzel M&Ms were invented.”


IMG_7589.JPGReds staffers and cousins, Zach Bonkowski and Chris Herrell ride to work together every morning…in the General Lee



Juan Francisco uses a Fisher-Price model baseball glove to field grounders during batting practice.



Joey Votto and others watch as Bill Bray is mauled in right field by a Siberian Tiger.



Minding his own business, Joey Votto accidentally trips a bobby trap and is captured by the Ewoks.



Scott Rolen reacts after accidentally making eye contact with the Siberian Tiger in right field.



Just as he fields this grounder, Juan Francisco realizes his zipper is down.



Angry that the Rice-A-Roni jingle blares on the GABP loud speakers every time he makes a play, Juan Francisco relieves his frustration by heaving a baseball into the scoreboard control room, taking out everyone responsible for the joke.



Mr. Burns and Smithers go over some notes today before the game.




This man wants to appear on the Great American Ball Park Kiss Cam with YOU at a future Reds game.  For details, Tweet Zach Bonkowski at



“You mean to tell me Bruce Willis was dead the whole time?!”



Jonny Gomes address his bleeding retinas after staring directly at Marty Brennaman’s shirt.



Paul Janish is unaware that the person standing just behind him isn’t Chris Heisey, rather it’s a devious alien who has morphed into the likeness of Chris Heisey in order to take over the planet Earth.


And finally, some of you have asked about Burt BobbleRed.  Here’s an update…






These are great, Jamie! Especially Rolen surviving “FIFTY-FIVE days alone in the African grasslands!” I love reading your captioned photos! Thanks for my nightly laugh!

thanks for the giggles tonight – those are priceless!🙂

These are great, J-Ram! You are doing the Lord’s Work. GO REDLEGS!!!

Absolute freakin’ gold! I especially like the one about Votto being captured by the Ewoks. However, given his divine qualities, wouldn’t he just raise a hand and they would release him?


Your captions were especially great!! Love it!

WATCH OUT, JANISH!! Haha, I look forward to these captions everyday. Thanks!

Jamie, is there anyway we could get a look at Marty’s shirt? maybe you could use somekind of filter to post it so it doesn’t hurt anyone. I’d like to see it.

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